


The Cherry Crush and the Chemical Rush

by Proxima_Centauri



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Drunk Texting, Drunken Shenanigans, Drunkenness, I promise it's funnier than it sounds, M/M, This will likely have more plot later too, Watson gets a little pissed, drunk!lock
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-21
Updated: 2013-02-21
Packaged: 2017-11-30 00:59:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/693547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Proxima_Centauri/pseuds/Proxima_Centauri
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock Holmes is investigating a suspect. He's also grossly inebriated (for the case, of course). What happens after he texts John to take him home, and will it change the way they interact to solve cases forever?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Cherry Crush and the Chemical Rush

**Pub. Case. Lost the suspect. Also half my disguise. Come get me? -SH**

**What were you doing tracking down a suspect at 2AM? There is such thing as sleep. Heard of it? –JW**

**You know I have, John. I can't help that most criminals operate at night. –SH**

**You told me just yesterday that they operate in the daytime. -JW**

**Wait... are you drunk? –JW**

**What makes you think I'm drunk? I don't drink. Nope. –SH**

**Like hell you don’t. You have a history, Sherlock. You know that. -JW**

**With drugs, not with alcohol. Terrible taste. Makes it hard to deduce. -SH**

**Which pub are you at? I could always have Mycroft give you a lift... –JW**

**No thank you. He's likely too busy stuffing himself with the truffle Mummy sent him for his... –SH**

**Birthday? –SH**

**His birthday was three months ago. I doubt the truffle lasted that long. -JW**

**What was yesterday, then? I remember the gluttonous smile, I know he has truffle and I am certain he's stuffing it into his mouth as we speak. -SH**

**AS WE TYPE. -SH**

**No need to be technical. Yet again, look who I'm 'typing' to. As for the truffle, your mum sent it to you but you refused to even look at it... Remember? –JW**

**Of course I remember. I figured it would be more fun to tempt my dear brother with something he could not eat. -SH**

**I think it's because you have some sort of deep seated anger against her. But, hey, sociopath. I could be wrong. -JW**

**Of course I don't hate Mummy. She's... Mummy. -SH**

**Your love of family isn't very strong either, John. –SH**

**DON'T. Just... don't, Sherlock. –JW**

**I've never seen you have a conversation with Harry that doesn't break down into screaming. Facts, John. –SH**

**Aw bugger, Anthea's here. –SH**

**Well, your conversations with Mycroft are like watching an American sitcom. -JW**

**Damn, I didn't even call him. -JW**

**Tapped the line, damn it all. MYCROFT, I AM SENDING YOU CHERRY CORDIALS FOR A YEAR. –SH**

**We're hardly American. That American couldn't recognize a debate if it paraded around him in a sheet. -SH**

**You mean if YOU paraded around him in a sheet? –JW**

**I am hardly a debate, John. -SH**

**Request rescue. -SH**

**Or half a disguise. -SH**

**Denied. -JW**

**You didn't get the milk.-JW**

**Johnnn - SH**

**Can we get the milk on the way home? -SH**

**I was going to get it –SH**

**...would you be angry if I said my wallet was gone too? –SH**

**Sherlock...what have you been up to? And don't try bluffing me, you'll only embarrass yourself. -JW**

**I told you, tailing a suspect. –SH**

**WHEN YOU WERE NOT 'ON THE JOB'. -JW**

**Did I stutter? -JW**

**You can hardly stutter via text, John. –SH**

**You are avoiding my questions, as usual. Just tell me what's going on, please? -JW**

**She's not leaving. -SH**

**I am in a broom cupboard with half a disguise and am unable to make my way home. Help. -SH**

**Broom cupboard is being generous. –SH**

**IT SO HAPPENS that I am outside of that broom cupboard. -JW**

**Liar, I can hear you breathing. -SH**

**Wait. -SH**

The world’s only consulting detective, Sherlock Holmes, peeked out of the small crack formed where the door and it’s frame didn’t quite match up perfectly and was greeted by the sight of an irate army doctor tapping his foot and glaring at the door, mobile in hand.

**How did you find me. -SH**

**I've been watching you from across the bar. Which you would have clearly noticed if you were sober. -JW**

**Now come out of the damn cupboard. –JW**

**No. -SH**

**Bring me a disguise. -SH**

**For the record, I WAS on a case. –SH**

After this text message John Watson rolled his eyes and reached for the door handle, surprised when it opened with no resistance at all. _He must be fairly drunk to forget to lock the door…_ John thought as he peered around the dark cupboard, waiting for his eyes to adjust. Finally he locked eyes on Sherlock huddled in a corner with a cherry stuck to his nose.


End file.
